Showing posts with label Improvisation. Show all posts

Man with Romney face tattoo ‘disappointed’ with election results

Man with Romney face tattoo ‘disappointed’ with election results - Eric Hartsburg was confident that Mitt Romney would win the election. Perhaps a little too confident. In the weeks leading up to Romney's showdown with President Barack Obama, Hartsburg had the Romney campaign logo tattooed on his face. (No, he wasn't even promised a position in Romney's Cabinet.)

Hartsburg didn't do it for free. Via eBay, he raised thousands of dollars to get the tattoo. The 30-year-old professional wrestler from Indiana said, "I am a registered Republican and a Romney supporter. I didn't mind getting this tattoo because it is something that I could live with and it's something that I believe in."

Man with Romney 'R' tattoo disappointed with election. (Eric Hartsburg/Facebook)

But that was before the election. Romney lost, and now Hartsburg isn't happy with his new ink. "Totally disappointed, man," Hartsburg told Politico. "I'm the guy who has egg all over his face, but instead of egg, it's a big Romney/Ryan tattoo. It's there for life."

The tattoo isn't subtle. At around 10 square inches, the ink can't be covered up without help from a ski mask (or maybe a wrestler's mask). Several weeks before the election, Hartsburg told ABC News, "In the beginning it was done for gags and publicity, but now I see it as a way to encourage young people to vote. We have so many rights that we don't utilize and young people need to exercise that right." Hartsburg also told ABC News that he got some weird looks. "A lot of people look at me and think I am the boogeyman."

Still, according to Politico, he isn't too broken up about Romney's loss. "I'm a tattoo guy, and it was something fun," he said. "I was trying to make politics fun. I didn't change no lives; I'm no hero. But I shed blood for this campaign, and I'm glad to know that I did all that I could." ( The Sideshow )

Grave business far from dead

Grave business far from dead. Indonesia’s pluralistic society has helped bring about many different styles of motifs used in stone carving, particularly in the art of bongpay.

This art, although it comes from the province of Fuk Jian in China, is no longer dominated by Chinese motifs such as dragons and the Hong bird (the phoenix).

Eternal writing: Two workers write Chinese calligraphy on a bongpay in a workshop in Surabaya. JP/Indra Harsaputra

Suwanto Susetyo, 50, was busy watching one of his eight employees carving an image of Jesus ordered by a member of a Christian family of Chinese descent.

“The bongpay art of stone carving is changing. Apart from the motifs, the material now used is no longer greenstone, but river stone and marble,” Suwanto told The Jakarta Post a few days ago.

Bongpay (in Mandarin, Mu-bei) is Hokkien dialect for a gravestone used on Chinese graves. Bongpay were previously made from greenstone (a kind of jade), which is believed to bring good fortune to the owner. The history of the deceased and the loyalty of his or her grandchildren is usually carved on the bongpay using Han characters.

During the Tang Dynasty (618-907), a bongpay was in the center of the gravestone and included a biography of the deceased. But in the period of the Song Dynasty (960-1279), changes occurred in the writing, images used such as dragons, clouds and the Hong bird.

There are no historical records mentioning when bongpay stone sculpture first entered Indonesia. But a few bongpay artists in Surabaya believe it started between the 16th and 19th centuries, after Admiral Cheng Ho’s landed in Java, followed by totokers (traders, soldiers and other male migrants from China) who came to trade in Indonesia.

Suwanto is a third generation bongpay artist, whose grandfather, Tjio Kim Ek, came to Indonesia with his eldest son Tjwan Tik Sing in the 1930s.

Tjio Kim Ek, an artist and greenstone trader from China, initially visited Indonesia to collect money from some of his trading partners in Java. He didn’t stay for long because his wife and children were still in China.

But, after a stopover in Surabaya, Tjio Kim Ek became interested in opening a business on Jl. Bunguran near the intersection of Jl. Kembang Jepun.

As the first child, according to Chinese tradition, Tjwan Tik Sing was asked to manage the bongpay business in Surabaya.

Stone of Jesus: An artist produces a picture of Jesus on a bongpay (Chinese tombstone) in a workshop in Surabaya. JP/Indra Harsaputra

This business continued to grow until Tjio Kim Ek finally decided to stay in Surabaya. He married Kartini, a Javanese woman from Surabaya, and was blessed with four children. One of them was Sutikno, the father of Suwanto.

“Tjwan Tik Sing died in the battle of Surabaya against the allied troops. He was shot by the allies when he was a young man and never had time to get married,” said Suwanto.

Before Tjio Kim Ek passed away, he asked Sutikno to take over his bongpay stone business.

Today, Suwanto is hoping his first child, Herman Susetyo, 20, who is currently studying management at one of the private universities in Surabaya, will eventually take over the bongpay business. Meanwhile Herman’s brother, who is studying graphic design, is preparing to help his brother in the business.

“My father, Sutikno, advised me that the management of the family business should be handed over
to the eldest son, not to all the children, because he was afraid there would be fights over the business,” he said.

Suwanto said the ancient art of carving bongpay had been passed down from generation to generation, with noticeable changes over the years in the materials used, the motifs and patterns of bongpay.

In the first generation, for example, artists only made bongpay using greenstone imported from China.
Nowadays, carvers from the fourth generation use marble or granite from Italy and local river stone.

“Previously we only used Han characters, but to meet the needs of many Muslims of Chinese descent, we have learned how to inscribe Arabic on the stone,” he said. ( thejakartapost.com )

Treat Your Job Search Like a Marathon

Treat Your Job Search Like a Marathon. In this recession, you may be surprised how long it's taking to find a job, especially if previous searches have gone fairly quickly. Unfortunately, as the unemployment rate continues to climb, more people are looking for work and the competition only gets tougher. Need advice for making it through a long job search? Take the same approach you would if you were running a marathon. Here are some ways in which the two activities are similar and tips you can use to land a new position:

You have to be patient

If you expect to spend just a few weeks training for a marathon, you'll be in for a rude awakening the day of the race. Competitors often spend months preparing. When it comes to the job search, the same holds true: You must have a realistic expectation of the time involved. Steeling yourself for an extended search can help you ward off frustration and lead to a pleasant surprise if you reach your goal sooner than expected.

You must put in the effort

Training for a marathon means waking up early to train, watching what you eat and enduring countless practice sessions. Finding a job takes a lot of work, too, from scouring the Internet for open positions to creating targeted application materials to networking with others in your field. That's why it's good to have a system in place. Set aside time each day to focus on your search and stick to your routine. For example, you may spend two hours each morning scanning online job boards for leads and the same amount of time in the afternoon reaching out to members of your network and establishing new contacts.

You don't have to go it alone

Some runners train on their own, but many form groups to help keep them motivated and on track. Looking for work doesn't have to be a private pursuit either. Reach out to friends, family and former colleagues to let them know you're on the job hunt; they may be able to provide you with job leads or referrals. In-person contact is important when networking; instead of relying solely on e-mail or Web sites such as LinkedIn, talk to people on the phone, take them to lunch or meet up with them in the evening.

Explore those avenues that allow you to network with others who are searching for employment. For example, you might consider joining a job-search club or attending a "pink-slip party," during which recently laid-off professionals connect with companies that are hiring and recruiting firms. In addition to expanding your base of contacts, you can share success strategies with others in your same situation.

You should set goals

Properly training for a marathon requires you to set regular goals for improving your speed and endurance. You also should set goals during your job hunt. For instance, you may seek to add one new contact to your network each week or complete a training course in a new software application within six months. Having an objective to work toward will help you stay focused and ensure you continue to move forward, improving your chances of finding a job. After reaching your target, treat yourself to a small reward -- like dinner out -- to keep motivation high.

You need the right gear

Wearing the proper shoes and clothing can make the difference in avoiding injuries and being comfortable while training for and running in a marathon. Your job hunt "gear" is your application materials. Your résumé and cover letter should be targeted to each opening you respond to. Ideally, they should also include keywords from the job posting. Many employers use software to search applications for these terms in order to determine which candidates should continue in the hiring process. And make sure your documents are in top-notch shape by carefully proofreading them before submission. Eighty-four percent of executives Robert Half polled said it takes just one or two typographical errors in a résumé to remove a candidate from consideration for a job opening.

Training for a marathon and looking for a job can both take a long time and require a tremendous amount of effort. But keep in mind the feeling you get when you cross the finish line or are offered a job you want; it's clear then that all the hard work has been worth it. ( msn.com )

Six Ways to Build a Glowing Reference List

Six Ways to Build a Glowing Reference ListIn today's competitive job market, those seeking employment need to do everything they can to distinguish themselves from the competition. A less-than-glowing reference can set you apart in the wrong way.

When our company asked executives to describe the most unusual reference checks they'd conducted, the responses included someone whose mom recommended her for the position and a job candidate whose reference said the applicant didn't like the industry in which she was trying to get a job.

Following are some suggestions for assembling a reference list that works for you, not against you:

1. Don't ambush your connections

Make sure the people you name as references are aware of this and are comfortable speaking on your behalf. For example, one respondent in the survey talked to a reference who starting laughing because he couldn't believe he was listed as a referral. Another reference had never heard of the job candidate he was asked to comment on. You don't want hiring managers to be greeted with these types of responses.

Before you submit a reference list to a prospective employer, provide each contact with an updated copy of your résumé and describe the company and position you've applied for, as well as the name of the person who will likely be calling. Contacting references beforehand will also allow you to make sure each individual is enthusiastic about your request; those who quickly return phone calls and are excited to speak about your capabilities make the best impressions on hiring managers.

2. Choose wisely

Just as you would adjust your cover letter and résumé for each position for which you apply, it's also a good idea to customize your list of contacts. Consider which of your references can best discuss the traits and qualities you possess that directly relate to the job. Such individuals won't necessarily possess the most impressive job titles. If you're applying for a management position, for example, it's helpful to provide contact information for a previous supervisor and someone you managed.

3. Remember, it's a small world

Some employers may go the extra mile to learn more about you, and social media sites can make such detective work easier than in the past. You should not only avoid burning bridges with former colleagues but also be selective about who's in your online network since a hiring manager could contact these individuals. Because of this reason, you may consider relying on different services for your personal and professional networks. For instance, you might use LinkedIn for business purposes and Facebook for personal ones.

4. Go the extra mile

Make it easy for an employer to speak to your references by providing clear contact information for each individual, including the person's name, phone number and e-mail address. You might even note the best time of day to reach him or her.

5. Tell the truth

One of the executives surveyed by our company spoke to a reference who said the job candidate didn't do the work he claimed to do during the interview. Another reference told an executive that the applicant didn't work for a firm she listed in her employment history. Hiring managers are bound to find out if you stretched the truth during the hiring process, so resist any temptation to be less than honest about your experience -- and make sure your references are forthright, too.

6. Say thanks

Even if a reference doesn't end up speaking to a hiring manager on your behalf, thank that person and keep him or her updated on the status of your search. If you are hired, be sure to send a thank-you note or even a small gift to your references. Also remember to not let the relationships go dormant until you're on the job hunt again. Keeping in touch with your references, even after you've settled into a new job, can help you maintain a solid network of professionals who can assist you in various ways throughout your career. ( msn.com )

The Mother-in-Law Gift Decoder

The Mother-in-Law Gift Decoder. It’s that time of year again -- the music, the mistletoe…the panic that your husband’s mom is going to buy you another bedazzled apron or automatic can opener (and you’ll have to pretend that you like it!). We might sound paranoid, but your mother-in-law could be trying to send you a message underneath that glossy paper and big red bow. And just in case you don’t speak Passive-Aggressive, we’re here to translate.

The gift: Framed photo -- which you’re not in

Translation: As if you didn’t have enough silver-plated frames from your engagement party and wedding (seriously, it’s okay to re-gift those), your mother-in-law gives you a shiny new one…with a photo of her and her darling son. You think: Um, thanks? Here, she’s trying to establish that she’s still his number one. Hang onto the frame until she leaves and then slip in a photo of all three of you -- or just you and your husband, if you want to make a statement.

The gift: What to Expect When You’re Expecting

Translation: Yeah, you were going to pick up a copy of this pregnancy book anyway -- in about three years. But congrats, now you don’t have to buy one! (Insert eye roll here.) Your mother-in-law is letting you know in a not-so-subtle way that she wants grandkids, and she wants them pronto. Put the kibosh on her pregnancy pressure by saying, “Thanks! This will be great for me to read so I know what my sister/best friend/coworker’s going through.”

The gift: Flannel nightgown

Translation: So your mother-in-law knows that you have sex, right? Well, sure. But she also doesn’t want to think of her son getting all riled up by you wearing that lace bra-and-thong combo (oh, and don’t forget the stockings!) that you have tucked away in your top drawer. Strange? Yes. Horrible? Not really. As far as mother-in-law gifts go, flannel is pretty harmless -- so take it in stride. Hey, all that unsexy plaid might actually come in handy on a night when you’re not in the mood.

The gift: Crock-Pot

Translation: Spending two hours making dinner every night just isn’t in the cards, but your mother-in-law continually comments on how thin her son looks these days. Her solution: the Crock-Pot. Notice how she can’t help but mention how easy it is and that anyone (gasp, even you!) can do it? This gives her the opportunity to stand on her nobody-takes-care-of-my-son-like-I-do soapbox. Throw her for a loop and show your husband the slow cooker, saying, “Look, hon, you’ve been wanting one of these for that stew you make!”

The gift: DustBuster

Translation: Okay, so your house doesn’t sparkle -- but that’s because you have something called a life. This gift is the equivalent of your mother-in-law telling you to clean your room, er, house…or you’re grounded, young lady! Toss it in a pile with the other gifts and then ask your husband to get the receipt from her the next day so you can exchange it.

The gift: Body lotion

Translation: Attention shoppers: Generic gifts, aisle four! Unless you have an obsession with berry-scented lotions that your mother-in-law knows about, this is a total cop out. She’s telling you that she’s not going to put much time or effort into shopping for a present you might actually need or want. Don’t make a fuss -- just stick it in the guest bathroom for friends and family to use, and make a mental note to get her a three-pack of shower gels for her birthday.

The gift: Workout DVD

Translation: True, you casually mentioned on Thanksgiving that you were hoping to lose five pounds, but just about the last thing you want to open on Christmas morning (after pigging out on sugar cookies all week) is a video of ab workouts. There are two ways to take this: One, your mother-in-law agrees that you should lose five pounds, or she really thought you’d like the gift -- and was actually trying to do something nice. For peace of mind, go with the latter. (thenest.com )

Avoid Thank-You Note Hell

Avoid Thank-You Note Hell.

Step 1: Grab your address list

Remember when you (or a family member) gathered your guests’ names and addresses when you sent off those wedding invites? Grab that list so you don’t have to backtrack. If you can print them off your computer with a label-making program, half of your work is done already! By the way, if you used the Guest List Manager on The Knot, log into your address book on The Nest. All of your contacts will be there; it’ll keep track of the gifts and addresses for you!

Step 2: Get your gift-givers straight

Most gift registries keep a master list of who gave you what, so print out a copy. For all the people who went off your registry, the sooner you jot down what they gave you, the better (before postwedding brain freeze sets in).

Step 3: Divide and conquer

Split up the task with your spouse during commercial breaks (have him do his friends and family, and you do yours). Try for 10 a night. Is one of you on a writer’s strike? At least agree to sign the card so both of your names are there. Hint: The person who doesn’t write the cards becomes the envelope-licker and stamp-sticker.

Step 4: Start writing

Just like you don't want to open a boring gift, no one wants to read a boring thank-you. Say why you love the item, thank them for their support, or mention something funny, like how they were a dance machine at your reception. If the gift was money, mention how you plan to use it (house down payment, amazing honeymoon). Once it’s signed and sealed, put a fat checkmark next to the guest's name and beg your new spouse for a quickie hand-massage. Phew, just a few more to go! ( thenest.com )

Could You Two Handle a Baby for the Day?

Could You Two Handle a Baby for the Day?. My husband and I want children, but we’re not quite ready to give up last-minute getaways, expensive dinners, and eight hours of sleep a night. So when our friends asked if we could babysit their 10-week-old son, Connor, we thought it was the perfect way to test the waters without taking the plunge. Besides, how hard could it be?

Photo by Gregoire Vion

1:00 In hunter-gatherer style, I heat up a bottle for Connor while my husband makes a food run. Armed with my instructions from Connor’s mom, I feed him two ounces of milk, burp him, feed him another two ounces, and burp him again. He grunts and coos as he gulps down milk while simultaneously farting on my arm. This kid’s got talent.

1:30 By the time my husband returns with lunch, Connor’s diaper feels like a wet towel. I haven’t changed many diapers in my 33 years, so I don’t quite expect it when Connor claims his territory by peeing everywhere. I try to figure out which end of the diaper goes under his rump. Then I put him in a clean blue-and-white striped onesie.

1:40 I sit down on the couch with Connor in my arms until he falls asleep. I examine his long eyelashes and tiny fingers and see how it might be hard to do anything other than stare at your baby all day long. My husband watches the Yankees game, which is okay because he gave up tickets to babysit with me instead, exhibiting one of the essential ingredients of parenthood: sacrifice.

2:00 I finally scarf down my lunch (do moms ever eat?) while my husband holds Connor, who’s still sleeping like a -- well -- baby. Minutes after Connor’s mom calls to check on him, he opens his eyes and starts to cry. The crying becomes air-gulping hysterics that make his little face turn a bright shade of red.

2:45 Connor is still screaming bloody murder as my husband and I stare at each other, wondering what to do. I heat up another bottle, and after several tries, the baby takes it. Sweet silence. We put Connor in his bouncy seat. While he naps, I scour magazines and my husband looks for a higher paying job online. I wonder if having a baby on the brain has this effect on all men?

4:30 The baby stirs, and I pick him up. check to see if he needs a new diaper, but it’s dry. He seems to like it on the changing table, so I talk to him while he laughs and kicks his little legs. A short while later, Connor’s relaxed parents return. Hallelujah!

The verdict
We still want a little one, but even one afternoon of babysitting is exhausting. Once our own bundle of joy does arrive, we can kiss those lazy weekends good-bye. One thing I know for sure is that my husband will be a great father (he didn’t think twice about wiping spit-up off Connor’s chin), and I’ll be an equally good, if not slightly neurotic, mom. Until then, we’ll be a happy family of two. ( thenest.com )

Ten Signs You've Got the Postwedding Blues

Ten Signs You've Got the Postwedding Blues. So you get married and a funny thing happens—you suddenly have tons of time on your hands! All those hours you spent planning the perfect wedding have become big holes in your calendar. Admit it: You kind of miss stressing out over which flowers to use in your centerpieces and googling the best hairstyles to wear with a veil (ahem, while at work). Hey, it’s okay to be a little bummed now that the big day has passed, but here’s how to tell if you’ve gone totally over the edge.

1. You decide to turn your veil into a pretty lace curtain (and then secretly stand under it and recite your wedding vows when you think no one could possibly be watching).

2. You answer questions with “I do” instead of “yes”—which is driving your friends, family and coworkers up the wall (and it’s why nobody’s in a hurry to return your calls).

3. Your new favorite hobby is watching the raw footage of your wedding video on repeat while chowing down on a slice of stale cake.

4. You’ll no longer leave the house without something old, new, borrowed and blue.

5. You host a dinner party re-creating the food at your reception, giving the option of chicken, fish or steak.

6. You’re planning the weddings of everyone you know who’s had a significant other for more than a month. Okay, a week.

7. You now call all of your vacations “honeymoons,” including when you’re just going home to see your parents for a few days.

8. You order your signature cocktail when out at your favorite bar—never mind that the “Lovetini” isn’t exactly on the menu.

9. You buy the chic paper lanterns you see at a flea market because they would’ve been just perfect for your cocktail hour.

10. You invite your married girlfriends over for a “wear your wedding dress” party and play all the music from your reception. ( thenest.com )

The weaker sex?

The weaker sex?. Here's a cheerful finding for those who say that males push females around too much: On the molecular level, it appears male genes may have to leave their homes for protection, researchers report.

Home is the X chromosome, which plays a key role in determining the sex of the carrier. A female has two X chromosomes, while a male has one X and one much smaller Y chromosome. Studies in mice and humans show an unusually large number of genes can jump from the X chromosome to non-sex chromosomes, a research team at the University of Chicago reports in the Jan. 23 issue of Science.

Contradicting popular beliefs

That finding contradicts two beliefs widely held by geneticists, explains study leader Manyuan Long, an associate professor of ecology and evolution.

It has been thought that gene traffic is no greater for the X chromosome than for all the other genes, which are called autosomes. That's just not true, Long says.

And standard theory holds that the X chromosome is the site of action for most sex-related genes. The Chicago studies show that many of the genes that leave the X chromosome are involved in male sexual development, and they may go elsewhere to do what they have to do.

Male sexual problem help

At the moment, this is an exercise in pure, basic science. But it might someday provide useful insights into treatment of male sexual problems, since many of the jumping genes are involved in sperm formation, says J.J. Emerson, a member of the research team.

This helps us understand which particular genes are likely to be involved in spermatogenesis, Emerson says. So we can infer that anyone looking for genes involved with sperm formation can look at our genes.

As every schoolboy knows, chromosomes carry the genes that carry the information for production of the proteins that enable a living organism to live and grow.

Growth means the production of new cells, and therefore of new chromosomes. A human, for example, starts as a single cell, which divides to form two cells, which divide to form four, and so on. At each division, a complete set of chromosomes is produced for each new cell.

Production line not perfect

But the chromosomal production line is not perfect. Changes occur - changes that can result in the new traits that are essential for the evolution of life. And those changes can include the transfer of a gene from one chromosome to another.

What we see is that when genes are copied from one chromosome to another, the copying from the X chromosome is excessive, Emerson says. The explanation is that natural selection is responsible for this excess.

Two possible reasons

There are two possible reasons why this occurs, he says, and both of them are based on the weakness of males - at least at the genetic level.

One is that a male carries only a single X chromosome, and therefore it is less likely that a male-helpful gene will be able to do its work. By jumping to an autosome, the male gene increases its chances of being productive.

The other explanation is sexual antagonism, Emerson says. We would expect that female genes would have more of a say on the X chromosome. If so, and they don't care about male genes, in those cases where it would benefit females at the expense of males the only way for a male gene to work is to escape from the X chromosome.

If that explanation is correct, the war between men and women is being waged molecule against molecule. And at that level, it is the male who is weakest. - ( health24.com )

Ten reasons he may not ask you out again

Ten reasons he may not ask you out again -- Guys can be fickle, or, as the French say, "huge jerks who don't call women back." Sometimes, though, we've got a pretty valid excuse for not picking up the phone. Here are 10 reasons why men might not call you back for that second date.

Columnist advises staying off your phone and cooling it with texting if you want a second date.

1. We're shy/intimidated.

Some guys just get intimidated, or we're too shy to ask for a second date. Make sure you get his number, and call the dude up to scope things out.

You'll know if he's intimidated in the first 10 seconds of the call when he either claims the phone is on fire and hangs up or he nervously vomits into the receiver.

2. You didn't offer to pay.

Most men have no problem paying for their dates. We're gentlemen at heart, or at least we like to think so. Still, we like it when our dates at least offer to cover their share.

If our date seems to be taking advantage of a free dinner, that second date isn't going to happen.

3. There's no physical attraction.

This one isn't that likely, since he probably asked you out on the first date. If it was a blind date or if you changed some key part of your appearance (you dyed your hair pink and lost/gained 150 pounds) before the date, it can certainly throw things off.

4. Talking too much about yourself.

Don't confuse confidence with vanity -- if you're going on and on about yourself, we're not coming back for seconds. Be sure to keep the conversation two-sided, and keep some mystery alive by not jamming your biography into an hour-long dinner.

5. Talking about ex-boyfriends.

Don't bring up your ex on a first date, especially to tell us how you're still excellent friends. We hear, "I'm still into this dude, but yeah, you're, uh, pretty OK."

6. Cell phone shenanigans.

If you're on the phone constantly during a first date, we're not going to be on the other end of the line later on. This applies to texting, too; in fact, texting seems even ruder.

7. Vulgarity.

Guys like a girl who can be as vulgar as their guy friends, but don't trot out your award-winning burps or four-letter fiestas until at least the second or third date.

8. Blatant pre-date lies.

This one's common with the internet dating crowd. Don't tell lies about yourself before the date kicks off. Don't say that you're a rich hand model who enjoys Russian literature (note: I have actually been told this). Unless, of course, you actually are any of those things (she was not).

9. You missed his signals.

Some guys have trouble making a move, and if you shrugged off his arm on your shoulder because you were hot or leaned away from a kiss because you heard your neighbors going through your trash, he might be feeling rejected.

Call him to set things straight. While you're at it, call the cops on your creepy neighbors.

10. He met someone else.

If it was just a first date, an old relationship might have flared up or the guy might have met someone that he'd rather date. He doesn't feel an obligation to call you and say anything since, well, it was a first date.

Don't hold it against him, but don't wait around either. If you don't get a call within about a week of the first date, forget about it and move on ( cnn.com )

Don't stress this busy holiday season!

Feel Instant Calm. Don't stress this busy holiday season!. Here are 6 quick tips to help you in any tough situation.

6 stress-less tricks

Even though you can flip on the tube and watch Emeril, Guy, Jamie or Tyler whip up a mean meal, off the Food Network it's still women who do the lion's share of the food shopping, cooking and cleanup—especially around the holidays. But you don't have to resign yourself to feeling frazzled. "What distinguishes one person's meltdown from another's indifference is their perception of control over the situation," says Paul J. Rosch, M.D., president of the American Institute of Stress. Try these strategies and you'll be prepared to shrug off any tough situation this busy season throws at you:

1. Tea off

In a study at University College in London, 75 volunteers drank the equivalent of a cup of black tea before completing two stressful tasks. Afterward, their cortisol levels dropped an average of 47 percent, compared with 27 percent for the people who didn't imbibe.

2. Just say " it!"

Swearing reduces stress, according to research published in the Leadership & Organization Development Journal. We don't suggest dropping the F bomb in the middle of an intimate dinner party, but a strategically placed expletive in the privacy of your car, kitchen or bedroom can help you blow off steam.

3. Press the issue

Acupressure is a quick and effective tension releaser—it can reduce stress by up to 39 percent, according to researchers at Hong Kong Polytechnic University. For fast relief, massage the fleshy area between your thumb and index finger for 20 to 30 seconds.

4. Treat yourself

Flavonoids in cocoa relax your body's blood vessels so that arteries can dilate, reducing blood pressure, a study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found. Look for dark chocolate or cocoa powder, which have more of the stress-busting compound than milk chocolate, and keep it to one serving.

5. Take a YouTube-timeout

Just the anticipation of laughing significantly decreases levels of the stress hormones dopac, cortisol and epinephrine, according to researchers at Loma Linda University in California.

6. Chew the fat

According to a study from the University of Pittsburgh, people with the highest blood levels of EPA and DHA omega-3 fatty acids are happier, less impulsive and generally more agreeable. Boost your mood by adding foods rich in omega-3's—salmon, herring and sardines top the list—to your holiday feasts. Or try a daily supplement of 400 milligrams each of EPA and DHA fish oils.

( msn.com )

Vietnam sees the funny side of sex

Vietnam sees the funny side of sex. Vinh, a 24-year-old man, says his parents never talked to him about sex.

"But they would make jokes about it so that I know what they expect from me," he says.

Vinh is from Hue, one of the most traditional cities in Vietnam, but this attitude is found throughout the country, according to the authors of the first survey into sex and sexual attitudes carried out in the communist state for 50 years.

By turning it into a joke, some parents and children find it is easier to talk about sex without being judged or getting embarrassed.

This attitude seems to apply to all - young and old - in Vietnam.

But for some, the subject really is no laughing matter. The communist state is deeply conservative and sex is a highly sensitive subject.

Dilemmas

Economic liberalisation and development have made Vietnam a more open society and there has been a noticeable change in sexual behaviour.

Medical experts say increasing numbers of people are having sex below the age of consent, leading to rising numbers of unmarried women having abortions.

There is also the problem posed by unprotected sex and more people contracting HIV.

Faced with these dilemmas, there have been discussions about putting sex education on the school curriculum at an early age.

Based on the findings of the sex survey, some people think that may not be such a bad idea.

All male callers said that sex before marriage for men is normal and okay, but they would not want to get married to someone who has lost her virginity through sex

Hong Hanh
Radio presenter

Researchers spoke to 245 people in both rural and urban areas over six years.

They discovered that teenagers or young adults "never" or "hardly ever" talked to their parents about sex.

The parents too admit that they do not speak to their children about it.

For those who do feel they should discuss the subject with their children, just how to broach it is difficult.

Diep Hoa, a mother of two, is typical in this regard. She says she used a letter to talk to her 17-year-old daughter about sex.

"I wrote to her and gave the letter to her on the day she left home to go to study abroad. I told her that I would like her to read it while on the plane," explains Mrs Hoa.

"I mentioned a lot of things in the letter, including sex and relationships. I would like her to understand what love is, what sexual relationships are and the consequences when one loses control of their sexual desires."

Gender prejudice

The survey also found that what is okay for a man is not okay for a woman.

Hong Hanh is a 22-year-old presenter of a live radio programme on HIV and Aids prevention targeted at young people.

"All male callers said that sex before marriage for men is normal and okay, but they would not want to get married to someone who has lost her virginity through sex," Hanh says.

My parents say if you get her pregnant before marriage, you both won't be allowed to go in the house by the front door

Vinh, Hue

According to Dr Khuat Thu Hong, one of the three authors of the research, "Vietnamese people have a very poor, misperceived and somehow one-sided view about sex, because there is no open or serious discussion of the matter."

She says this is very dangerous because "it leads to a lot of wrongly imposed sexual perceptions toward men and women, and it limits both sexes from enjoying a sexual relationship."

Some experts say that sex education, which is only taught in some schools, should be made compulsory because young people would benefit from the knowledge provided to them in a serious manner rather than through jokes.

However, there has been opposition to this suggestion from those who uphold what they call "traditional values".

The funny side

Teachers too find the subject highly embarrassing, and some parents and children see nothing wrong with discussing a highly taboo subject in a humorous way.

Back in his very traditional hometown, Vinh smiles and gives some examples of what his parents tell him.

Report author Dr Khuat Thu Hong says
sex should be taken seriously

"They say: 'If you get her pregnant before marriage, you both won't be allowed to go in the house by the front door', or 'you won't be allowed to go near our ancestors' altar'.

"Another favourite is: 'We will have to make a small shed near the pigsty for you to live in!'"

This indirect and light-hearted way that some parents use to talk to their children about sex as a means of educating them is also a warning to children of the consequences of sex before marriage.

But faced with rising underage sex and HIV, Dr Hong says it is about time that Vietnamese learned to talk openly about the subject.

And she hopes that the findings of the first sex survey in half a century will help change social perceptions and understanding of what remains an extremely delicate matter. / bbc

How to Find Holiday Jobs

How to Find Holiday Jobs. More Competition for Fewer Positions This Year. It's only October, but it's not too early to plot and plan if you're in the market for a holiday job. The early numbers tell us there will be greater competition for fewer positions.

In 2008, retailers added just 384,000 jobs during the holiday season -- the lowest in 20 years and almost half of 2007's total, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

Already this year, 62 percent of retailers are seeing more seasonal applicants than last year, but 40 percent say they'll hire fewer seasonal workers, according to consulting firm Hay Group.

Some companies are giving their existing staff first shot at picking up extra hours, which is good news for those workers, but it means increased competition for anyone who wants to break in.

But all hope is definitely not lost; opportunities exist, so let's look at where the jobs are.

Go Big and Go Small

Look at big box, big names, especially in retail and package handling because this is their busiest time of year. Similarly, look at the same types of businesses in your own backyard.

Package Handling

UPS will hire 50,000 seasonal package handlers and drivers' helpers. (That's down from 60,000 two years ago, but it's a big number of openings.) These are fast-paced, physically demanding roles with average pay starting at $8.50 an hour. UPSJobs.com lists all the openings by location.

Just as we see a giant like UPS hiring, so too are local independent delivery services. My small messenger service adds walkers, bikers and drivers for the holiday rush. Look up the locals in your area and just cold call.

Retailers

Toys R Us will hire 35,000 seasonal employees nationwide, which is on par with its workforce for the last two holiday seasons. Apply online at RUsCareers.com.

In addition to applying to the giants, walk the mall and your neighborhood looking for "help wanted" signs. And even without the signs, chat up store clerks to find out what's available and when. If you're friendly, you'll often get the inside scoop, even on unadvertised positions.

Season Jobs: How to Find Them

Tory Johnson has a few tips on how you can get a job around the holidays. (Getty Images)

Security Firms

Companies such as Allied Barton beef up their ranks with seasonal hires to safeguard the big crowds in stores.

Online Job Boards

One Web site I like for seasonal jobs is SnagAJob.com, which is a clearinghouse for a variety of part-time opportunities as diverse as taking holiday photos in JCPenney's portrait studios, to quick-serve restaurants nationwide and even winter resorts that add seasonal staffers.

Find Clients for Your Personal Services

The one thing we all want is more time, so think about the things people have to tackle over the holiday season -- shopping, wrapping, shipping -- all of which takes time that many of us don't have. If you're out of work, you have the time to do this for someone who is working.

Pitch yourself as a seasonal personal helper. Stand on line to make their purchases, get them wrapped and shipped.

Pet Sitting

With the exception of New Year's Eve, the demand for babysitting doesn't spike during the holidays because families spend more time together, so the need for care drops.

But the holidays are the biggest time of the year for pet care. People travel, especially around Thanksgiving, but they don't always bring their pets. Sites like Care.com see a 30 percent spike in demand for pet sitters during the holidays.

You can also find your own clients among neighbors. Research the going rates among well-established service providers and price

Four Final Tips

No matter what you're looking for, the key is to start looking now. Don't wait until Thanksgiving. Given the competition, don't delay your search.

Be willing to work all shifts since it'll increase your chances of being selected.

Apply online and in person. That one-two punch ensures that you're covering all your bases. Don't wait for your resume to be found online; do both.

And finally, know the product. Most seasonal jobs require people who need very little training.

You'll be thrown in with little ramp-up time, so establishing that you have solid customer skills and that you understand the company's products and services will set you apart from other applicants. / abcnews